When my beloved dog Toby was diagnosed with cancer in June 2023, my world turned upside down. For nearly two years, I poured myself into his care—countless vet appointments, treatment decisions, and the daily worry about his comfort and wellbeing. While I never questioned my love for Toby or my commitment to him, the toll on me as a caretaker was something I never expected.

I was stressed and overwhelmed. Depression crept in. I often felt like I was carrying the weight of the world on my shoulders, yet had no one to turn to who truly understood. Friends and family sympathized, but they didn’t know the unique heartache of watching a dog you love battle cancer day after day. I became withdrawn, isolated, and deeply sad. More than anything, I craved connection with others who “got it.” Sound familiar? You’ll meet a fellow Dog mom, Lauren, who will share her experience too.

I talked with my therapist, hoping we could find a support group where I might connect with fellow caregivers. But what we discovered was heartbreaking: there were plenty of grief or pet loss groups, but nothing specifically designed for people actively caring for sick pets. I didn’t just need help after Toby was gone—I needed support while we were still fighting together.

That gap is what inspired me to act. In November 2024, I completed facilitator training at PEER Seattle, a nonprofit that has been serving the community for decades by providing peer-led support groups, recovery services, and wellness programs for people navigating life challenges. Their mission to foster hope and healing through connection resonated deeply with me. With their guidance and training, I felt equipped to create the kind of space I so desperately needed during Toby’s journey. At first, I tried to launch an in-person support group in Seattle (Tails of Resilience). Despite my efforts, attendance was low and inconsistent—likely because caretakers are already stretched thin, and making time to travel was a barrier.

So, after some reflection, I shifted gears. In February 2025, we officially launched the Toby’s Hope Online Support Group for Caregivers of Sick Pets.

The group has quickly become a lifeline. Caregivers join from different places, bringing their stories, fears, and hopes. Together, we share not just the struggles, but also the small victories—the tail wags, the good lab results, the moments of love that make the hard days bearable. Meet Lauren, Stanley’s mom and a participant of the group as she shares how the group has helped her:

What made you decide to join the support group?

When I found out my boy had cancer I felt like I had zero control and little information. I was filled with so much fear and anxiety about the future. When I learned about the support group it was something to look forward to. I knew it would be filled with people like me. 

What were you hoping to find in the group and did you find it?

I absolutely found it. I was looking for support and further information. Joining the group helped me feel less alone. 

What part of the group has been most meaningful or helpful to you?

It is a safe place filled with people who love their dogs as much as I do. Filled with people who treat their dogs like their children/part of their family. 

Have you been able to support others because of what you’ve experienced here?

Yes, it has been nice to give back the support I have received. 

Would you recommend this group to others? Why or why not?

Absolutely, what we all go through is terrifying and can feel isolating. Joining the group can help us gain further knowledge and also give support during such a stressful time. It is such a comforting feeling to know you are not alone in this struggle. 

Starting this support group has been one of the most meaningful decisions of my life. It is Toby’s legacy: ensuring that no one else has to feel as alone as I did. My hope is that every caregiver who walks this difficult road finds a safe space, a listening ear, and the comfort of community.

Because no one should ever have to face this journey alone.

Interested in joining our group? We meet on Zoom every Tuesday and Thursday at 4:30-5:30pm PST. Email us at info@tobyshope.org for details.